We need help.

I’m learning to ask for help when I need it. It’s hard. It’s painful. It’s embarrassing, and if it was just me, I’d likely continue to suffer in silence rather than be a burden others – except I know that I like to help when I can, when people in my life need help, and I would hate for anyone to suffer in silence, and since I’m not actually special, this means I deserve that much consideration from myself, as well.

I’m starting a GoFundMe campaign to help offset the rising medical debt that Beth and I are accruing. My goal is $1200, with an eye to getting us caught up. Because I want to be as transparent as I possibly can, I’m going to bore you with numbers, and financial embarrassment be damned.

Our health insurance sort of sucks. I’m grateful that we have it at all, but it’s the sort of insurance that is good if you’re seeing a doctor once a year. I’m paying down a bill from the two visits I had to address my almost suicidal depression and anxiety, to the tune of $250. Beth’s current bill is just under $180. These would be manageable on our own if Corbie hadn’t have just had an emergency vet trip, and if we didn’t need to keep going to the doctor. Alas, our current doctor (one of the few on my insurance, in our area, and willing to deal with chronic pain issues) requires that we see her to get new prescriptions; for Beth that winds up being quarterly. I have another visit this week to get some skin stuff checked out and to get squared with my dosage for the antidepressant, and hopefully that’ll be the last one for a while. I also owe money to our urgent care people ($200) which I’ve been ignoring because there’s only so much I can look at, at any given time.

This would all have been fine, except as Beth wrote about, changes Etsy has made has slowed down business at her shop since April. Things were tight enough in May that we put off paying our utility bill, hoping to get caught up in June – but then Corbie needed to see the doctor, and Beth found out that she’s going to owe a few hundred in late fees for her state taxes.

And we still need to pay over $100 each month for Corbie’s heart medication.

I’m dropping my phone service, so that we’ll only have a house phone, which frees up $50 to cover the monthly payment with the IRS. We’re spending my next day off going through our books to see what we have to sell. Beth’s working hard to get more items up and different items up, and it breaks my heart that she’s even thinking about trying to find a part time job outside of the home, because she really, really can’t actually do that. Between her digestive issues, her pain issues, and the fibro fog, having her out, in public, on her own,  terrifies me. I want to keep her working from home at all costs — and she is looking into part time jobs that she might be able to do from home. We’re not spinning our wheels and bitching here. All that said, I think we’d be okay – providing NOTHING ELSE HAPPENS (I’m looking at you, Corbie!) – if we could get the medical bills caught up, have money earmarked for the next immediate visits for each of us, and get our utilities caught up. So, that’s what we’re asking for help with.

Ah, but we’re not asking for help, with nothing to give in return!

Anyone who donates $30 will receive: one e-book of Beth’s and one e-book of mine, of your choosing, and 10 sticks of Beth’s amazing incense.

Anyone who donates $50 will be granted access to my story subscription, and will receive all the installments for 2016, access to subscriber-exclusive material, one e-book of Beth’s and one of mine, of your choosing, and ten sticks of Beth’s amazing incense.

Anyone who donates $75 will receive a Beth-and-Jolene Writing Bundle – ALL of our e-books, access to my story subscription for 2016, access to subscriber-exclusive material, and 20 sticks of Beth’s amazing incense.

A donation of $100 or more will get you our undying gratitude, complete with tears, and! A Beth-and-Jolene Writing Bundle – ALL our e-books, all my past stories for the story subscription, access to the current subscription through 2016, access to subscriber-exclusive material, and 100 sticks of Beth’s amazing incense.

I’m hoping to have the GoFundMe live on Tuesday, sometime between going through all the books in storage to see what we’ll have to sell, and grocery shopping, and I’ll announce that once that happens. We’ll accept donations either through GoFundMe, once that’s up, or through PayPal (bluedolfyn@yahoo.com), so you have flexibility in terms of how you donate. I was going to wait to post this until that was ready – all posh and together – but instead I’m fighting despair by posting this now.

. Anything helps. And keep us in your thoughts, because if anything else happens, I really don’t know what we’re going to do.



23 thoughts on “We need help.

  1. Reblogged this on Wytch of the North and commented:
    As a follow-up to my post from yesterday: yes, this is a Thing. If you can help at all, THANK YOU. (Also, there are goodies involved!) I will post the link to the GoFundMe page as soon as it’s ready; feel free to share!

  2. Sent something. Hang in there, we have all been in these situations at one time or another.
    if we are not here to help each other when we can, why the hell are we here?

    I love you guys; hang in there.

  3. Dear ones — yesterday I posted a note on Beth’s site, which was eaten by some gremlin. I was too tired to repost — y’all know this one. I am SO SORRY that you need help. I’ve donated a bit via PayPal and next pay period I’ll buy something from Beth’s site. All I ask in return is that you live your lives. You both mean a lot to me. Love, Duff

    • Thank you, so much. I know that everyone who is helping us right now are not exactly super secure financially, either, and this means so much to us, I can’t event tell you. ❤

  4. I’m very sorry that you & your family are going through all this. 😦 Not sure what I can do right at the moment, but for now, good thoughts are coming your way and *all the hugs*

  5. So much love to you both and the furry family ❤
    I know how tough it is to ask for help, but dammit, a community, even online, still does the community thing, and that's help each other out!

    I will visit the gfm site when you have it up, and send my prayers up. Love, love, love to you!

    • Thank you! I’ve been rather burned out on pagans since April, and this is a huge, HUGE reminder that I need to pay attention to those who build up and ignore those who tear down (build up or fuck off!). I’m still extremely nervous, but I’m also loving the lessons in this, humbling as they are. Thank you.

    • Thank you! I’ve been rather burned out on pagans since April, and this is a huge, HUGE reminder that I need to pay attention to those who build up and ignore those who tear down (build up or fuck off!). I’m still extremely nervous, but I’m also loving the lessons in this, humbling as they are. Thank you.

      • Yes yes yes! I think if more people sought out people like this, it would start becoming the norm, to help others, to build others up. There’s no downside to it because our society and culture would become ultimately better for everyone!!

  6. Honey I am I the same boat financially but I wanted to say how very cool your post was! I know how hard that was for you to do! Not only did you step up to the plate ….you did it like a boss! Please reach up and pat yourself on the shoulder for major job done well!

    • Thank you for your kind words! I hate feeling this way — but I welcome the discomfort of asking for help as a way to help foster deeper empathy within me for others, when they ask for help. It’s one thing to think people should ask for help when they need it, and something else to *know* how it feels to do so. Hang in there! If there’s anything we can do to help, please let us know.

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