It’s a small thing, really. Certainly something that the giving of should not be threatening me the way it does, hurting me, causing such anguish. Poseidon has given me much, even in the last month He has given me so much that I have to be grateful for, and it is a small thing, this request. I won’t, even in the process, be losing anything . . . . yet it takes this one particular thing that has been private and personal and between us for a number of years and places that thing in the realm of “public property”, and it is breaking my heart, just a little.
I’ll do it, of course I’ll do it. He’s asked it of me, and it is a small thing, really. It will likely end being still private and personal and between us, most of the time. And I’m sure part of the anguish is no small amount of fear and reluctance to change and comfort in habits and patterns. Which is all the more reason to give it . . . as if I need more than He’s asked it of me. And then, I’ll give Him my breaking heart, too, because He can mend that like no one else.